Are romantic ties being jeopardized due to excessive self-importance?

Has Your Ego Impacting Your Romantic Bond?

In the complex tapestry of human relationships, excessive pride can weave a dark and destructive thread, according to mental health professionals. Josiah Teng, a clinician based in New York, explains that excessive pride can cause individuals to make all interactions and issues revolve around themselves. This focus, in turn, may overshadow the partner and the relationship as a whole.

Teng further elaborates that excessive pride often stems from deep-seated feelings of insecurity, unmet needs, unresolved emotional conflicts, or early life experiences such as parentification. These underlying issues can lead to inner anger, anxiety, and a need for control and validation, which can manifest as excessive pride.

The consequences of excessive pride can be far-reaching. McMahon, another mental health expert, warns that it may lead to gaslighting behaviors, potentially causing the end of the relationship. Refusing or finding it hard to compromise is a behavior that may be indicative of excessive pride. This stubbornness can create a barrier to intimacy, built on trust, communication, compassion, emotional security, and affection.

Moreover, excessive pride may cause individuals to focus primarily on themselves and never acknowledge their partners, making them feel insecure about what they're bringing to the relationship. Feeling constantly offended by the other person's opinions could also be a sign of excessive pride.

Communication can worsen when one is "too proud" to speak the truth of what one is feeling or thinking. Pride, when present in a relationship, can be characterized by persistent disagreeableness. This emotional disconnection can result in issues such as game playing, defensiveness, and resentment.

Narcissistic traits may be a sign that pride is taking over a relationship. A prideful partner may have difficulty admitting their own mistakes and may believe they can never be in the wrong. This can lead to a decreased sex life due to the impact on intimacy.

However, all is not lost. Speaking with a mental health professional can help manage excessive pride and guide partners to healthier relationship patterns when it feels beyond reach. Reflecting on one's values to live a values-based life can help overcome excessive pride, as suggested by Abdul. Reminding oneself of the importance of the relationship and wanting to encourage intimacy and a lasting bond can also help.

McMahon suggests using criticism to motivate self-improvement instead of taking it personally. Finding ways to express what one is feeling, such as journaling or asking to come back to the conversation at another time, can help overcome excessive pride. Refusing to apologize even when it could solve a conflict could be a sign of excessive pride, but acknowledging mistakes and apologizing when necessary can foster a healthier, more intimate relationship.

In conclusion, excessive pride can be a silent killer of intimacy in relationships. However, with self-awareness, reflection, and the help of a mental health professional, it is possible to overcome excessive pride and cultivate a more fulfilling, intimate relationship.