Guide for Severing Ties With a Buddy
In the realm of human relationships, friendships can sometimes take a turn for the worse, becoming toxic or simply fading away. Here's a look at some common reasons for friendship breakups and ways to find closure and move on.
A friendship can become toxic if it causes you anxiety, encourages unhealthy habits, or damages your self-esteem. For instance, if your friend consistently mocks you or leaves you feeling drained, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.
When a friendship ends, it's natural to feel a sense of loss. However, letting go does not mean forgetting your friend or holding grudges. You might even find yourself wishing them well as you move forward.
Part of setting boundaries involves learning that you don't have to say yes to everything. This includes not feeling obligated to answer calls and texts immediately, or initiating contact.
Many friendships end naturally over time, as life takes us in different directions. But when a friendship ends abruptly, finding closure can be challenging. Closure doesn't always mean having the last word or an admission of wrongdoing. It's more about gaining clarity to move on.
Writing a goodbye letter, for your eyes only, can help achieve this closure. This letter can include the good, the bad, and the in-between, allowing you to process your feelings and find peace.
Friendships, like romantic relationships, can coexist with love and heartbreak. It's important to remember that it's okay and natural for friendships to end.
A 2021 study suggests that good friends encourage healthy habits, share information, support, and companionship, and show solidarity. If your friendship no longer fulfills these aspects, it may be necessary to gently close it.
Visiting places, listening to songs, and looking at old photos that remind you of your friend can help acknowledge what you're missing. However, it's also important to remember that moving on involves finding new experiences and creating new memories.
An imbalanced friendship can leave you feeling frustrated if you give more time, energy, and empathy without getting much back, or if your friend wants more closeness than you do. In such cases, it may be best to vent alone or with a trusted counselor, rather than to another friend.
If you feel distrustful because your friend has gossiped about things you've shared in confidence, or they want you to keep secrets that put you in a compromising position with others you care about, or they're engaged in illegal activity, it may no longer feel safe for you to confide or be their confidante.
If you've grown apart from a friend due to political differences, different interests, or life stage changes, it may be challenging to spend time together. In such cases, it's important to remember that no one has to be to blame when a friendship ends.
In the aftermath of a friendship ending, activities like journaling, exercising, and having a movie marathon can help in releasing emotions and moving forward. Remember, every ending is a new beginning, and it's up to you to write the next chapter of your life.
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