Exploring the Connection Between Sexual Compulsions and Self-Absorption: An Analysis of Their Interplay

Connections Between Sexual Compulsion and Self-Centeredness: What's the Link?

In the realm of psychology, a fascinating connection has been observed between narcissism and sexual addiction. This dynamic, often referred to as sexual narcissism, is a topic of interest for many psychological experts, building on foundational work by renowned figures such as Sigmund Freud.

Dr. Paul Hokemeyer, a licensed marriage and family therapist in New York and fellow in Harvard Medical School's Global Leaders in Healthcare program, sheds light on this subject. He notes that sexual narcissists are master manipulators, testing boundaries and attempting to compromise them.

So, what does sexual narcissism entail? Traits may include a need for excessive attention or praise for sexual prowess and performance, sensitivity to real or perceived criticism about sex, obsession with sex, porn addiction, high-risk sexual behavior, and cheating on your partner.

But fear not, for treatment options do exist. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) aims to identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors. Therapists use positive reinforcement to appeal to the narcissist's need for praise and help shape their behavior. Psychodynamic psychotherapy, which focuses on underlying conflicts, can also be beneficial.

Successful treatment outcomes consist of softening the edges of their self- and relationally-destructive behaviors. Hokemeyer emphasizes the importance of emotional intimacy and one's own sexual pleasure in a relationship with a partner who has sexual narcissism.

However, it's crucial to approach these relationships with caution. Hokemeyer advises setting clear, consistent, and enforceable boundaries, avoiding statements that one cannot keep, such as, 'If you do x again, I'll NEVER have sex with you.' He also suggests that the best person to change in a relationship with a sexual narcissist is the individual themselves, as the chances of the sexual narcissist changing are slight.

It's important to note that sexual narcissism isn't a diagnosable condition or personality disorder. Narcissism, however, is an excessive preoccupation with oneself and one's own needs, classified as a personality disorder by the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th edition, text revision (DSM-5-TR).

Research suggests that narcissism may stem from inappropriate caregiving in childhood, such as being overly critical or excessively praising, admiring, or indulging the child. A 2014 study even found a positive correlation between Internet use and narcissism level, with those who used Internet pornography having higher levels of narcissism than those who had never used it.

If you suspect you're dealing with someone with sexual narcissism, Hokemeyer suggests visiting Psych Central's directory to find a therapist who can help navigate this issue in a relationship. Behind the grandiose facade of narcissistic personality disorder, there are deeply rooted feelings of shame, inadequacy, and unworthiness.

In conclusion, while sexual narcissism isn't a diagnosable condition, it's a significant issue that can impact relationships. Understanding its traits and seeking professional help can aid in managing and addressing this dynamic in personal relationships.