Companions of Mourning Partners Generally Perform These 5 Actions to Exhibit Solidarity and Comfort

In a heartfelt exploration of grief and support, psychotherapist Vikki Stark offers valuable insights into the complexities of comforting a grieving partner.

Stark notes that while it may seem difficult to know what to say or do, simple gestures can make a world of difference. Offering a hug, a listening ear, or asking questions like "How are you doing?" or "Is it difficult to sleep?" can help open up conversation and show support without saying something comforting.

The grieving process is deeply personal and varies greatly from one individual to another. Stark emphasises that grief does not follow deadlines; those who are grieving will get back to themselves when they are ready.

Anticipatory grief, where one knows their loved one will never experience certain life events, can be a part of the grieving process. In such situations, Stark suggests saying to a partner, "I am worried about you and I made an appointment with someone who knows more about bereavement than either of us."

Women, according to Stark, tend to talk more about their feelings, while men are often more inclined to "get on with it." However, it is crucial to remember that everyone's healing process is different.

Healing rituals, such as setting aside a particular time to go through a photo album or lighting a candle and saying memories, can help in the grieving process. In the beginning of mourning, the grieving person may need to be left alone, but after a few weeks or months, they may need to talk about the relationship and the death.

If you are asked to go with your partner to visit a dying relative, it is important to say yes, as refusing may indicate a lack of commitment to the relationship. Conversely, if a partner's loved one is dying, they need your support, and it is important to be there for them.

Stark also warns against saying, "I know just how you feel," as each loss is unique. The grieving boyfriend in one instance felt out of place at the funeral, but his presence was appreciated by the family.

In cases where a significant other cannot eat, sleep, or function at work, or becomes obsessed with the deceased person after a month or two, it may be a cause for concern. It is essential to offer support and encourage professional help if needed.

In conclusion, while the grieving process is unique to each individual, offering a hug, a listening ear, and encouraging professional help when needed can make a significant difference in supporting a grieving significant other.

Companions of Mourning Partners Generally Perform These 5 Actions to Exhibit Solidarity and Comfort